Love in Times of Laundry: Why Couples Therapy Isn’t Just for the ‘Almost Divorced’

Let’s be honest. The words “couples counselling” still tend to conjure up images of tear-streaked tissues, dramatic silences, and the dreaded “we’ve tried everything” moment. But here’s a reality check: therapy isn’t just for couples on the brink, even though that is definitely a moment for such an intervention. Sometimes, it’s for the couples where the small stuff, like not agreeing on what to watch on Netflix has somehow turned into big stuff; or perhaps you’re just one of those wise couples that knows that long relationships need periodic maintenance.

I work with adult couples facing all kinds of issues. There are the ones that build over time, like communication breakdowns, intimacy hiccups, unresolved baggage, or that gnawing feeling of “we’re more roommates than partners these days.” And then there are those that come with transitions. Whether you’ve just moved across the globe, retired after 40 years of the grind, or are staring at an empty nest, transitions have a sneaky way of messing with your love life. It’s not always dramatic, but it can be disruptive.

That’s where I come in—not with a magic wand, but with a structured, evidence-based approach (think Gottman Method, CBT, EFT, ACT) and always with compassion. I’m not here to watch you argue or nod sagely from a corner. I’m here to work with you—to help both of you get unstuck, reconnect, and move forward. And most importantly my job is to leave you with tools that you can employ any time in the future when life throws your relationship one of its curve balls.

The process is structured but grounded in real open talk. We’ll start with an assessment—yes, there will be questionnaires (sorry)—and get a good picture of where things stand. Then we’ll build a goal plan. Depending on your needs, we might do a little role-play, learn a few tools, and have a few “not-so-fun-but-necessary” conversations. There will be homework. There might be breakthroughs. You might even laugh. (It’s allowed.)

You want a faster and more concentrated approach? That’s where Marathon Couples Counselling comes in. Think of it as a relationship retreat (without accommodation)—many hours over two to three consecutive days, focused and intense, like bootcamp for your love life. It’s designed for couples in crisis, those with hectic schedules, or those who simply want to hit reset in a big way.

This isn’t about blaming, shaming, or dissecting your past until you forget why you got together in the first place. It’s about finding new ways to talk, argue better, reconnect emotionally, and rebuild trust. It’s about moving from “stuck” to “stronger.”

And finally, if you think your relationship is fine but you could use some deeper understanding, you just want to freshen it up, or you are curious about the quality of your marriage, you can choose for a marriage assessment which, like an X-ray, gives you an overview of the strengths and challenges in your marriage. You’ll be surprised.

So no, couples therapy isn’t just for those about to break up. It’s for those who believe their relationship is worth the work. Even if the biggest argument last week was about where the frying pan lives.

Final thought? You go to a specialist when your knee acts up. Why not get help when your relationship does too?

C&C Couples Counselling in the Algarve: structured, honest, and maybe even a little fun.